But, WOW. Do I feel this thing. OFTEN.

My mind whirls, clunks, turns, cranks. I believe things in my head that have a disconnect from my heart (AKA SOUL) and from my behavior.

I’ve been told that I take good care of others. There is a disconnect between that and my lack of self care.

Fortunately, I have a gracious and encouraging spouse. As well as friends and family who on my my side.

A work in progress – for sure.

Alright – let’s shift gears. With all of the dissonance in my brain… I still see a connection here…

I’m reading am incredible book for the D.Min project by Kerry Alys Robinson.

Imagining Abundance

Robinson notes that a theological ambivalence towards money is one of the major obstacles to viewing fundraising as ministry.

Is money holy or sinful? Is wealth neutral and is what feels sinful about it is connected to how it is obtained? Or maybe it is the degree to which we are attached to money that makes us feel uncomfortable? Is how we utilize money that makes it feel holy or sinful?

As a result of these unanswered questions, we tend to not develop a robust theology around money.

She notes that being aware of this is a crucial first step to “mitigating the cognitive dissonance one would otherwise bring to the task of religious fundraising.”

Christian fundraisers feel this cognitive dissonance on a regular basis as we breach a subject that tends to be taboo: money. How do we talk about it? Is it a private matter? A communal matter? What does God ask us to do with our money? We often have little answers in our training as fundraisers, and it makes us feel like we may be operating a slick salespeople, or simply trying to “get all we can” from our friends as we fundraise in our mission.

This feeling is disgusting and drives people to leave our mission and many other missions around the world.

We hear often “I would love my job if it wasn’t for the fundraising.”

This harmful theological ambivalence towards money informs this cognitive dissonance as Robinson so insightfully notes.

There has GOT TO BE A BETTER WAY TO APPROACH THIS.

So this is the thing I have learned this week on a personal (self care) and professional (Young Life) level:

The Inner Life of a human being is paramount to fighting cognitive dissonance.

More on that very soon. Right here on this there blog. Probably next week.

– Kevin Eastway

NOTE: I’m not sure how to footnote on this blog. If you’d like the footnotes to these thoughts, I’d be happy to email you my paper 🙂